"Why would you want to marry me anyhow?"

okay. so theres this totally awesome guy that i was interested in... like for a prom date... and well he's got a date. i hate this prom thing. its just all a big dissappointment.

 

Okay so its been a really long time since i've updated, but i thought since i dont work tonight and i'm waiting for my sister to call me to pick her up, i might as well update :-).... okay so a while ago i read this thing that buechler had up somewhere... *i can't really remember* and it was something that was saying like if you remember playing all these things during the day until the lights came on outside... and all these things that i remember doing when i was little and people at the age of 20 were "old" to us.... now i'm 4 years away from that, and i'm scared. I can't stand thinking that i haven't fulfilled what i had hoped i would be. I am a dissappointment to who i wanted myself to be. I wanted to do all these great things, have a boyfriend the SECOND i turned 16.... i imagined i would be soo different. But i've come to realize that.... there is absolutely nothing i can do about it. Nothing. I can try to hide the fact that i have flaws and be a stuck up person.... but i'm not going to... i'm gunna show you all that i have made mistakes, and i will continue making mistakes because NO ONE IS PERFECT. no one. but i'm still dissappointed that i'm not what i expected, but i'm good enough for right now. I dont like a lot of what i've become, but i'll learn to live because so i have learned life goes by too fast to regret everything that happens. So i'm not going to. I'll still regret somethings... thats just inevitable... so yeah.. thats my update. hope you all enjoyed this totally pointless entry that probably makes no sense because in the middle of it i left and came back a week later :-P